Smile. For life is a gift. Love is a treat and companionship is a meal. Feed your soul. Rest your eyes. I believe.
Recently communication has been breaking down all around me. For months it never existed. In so many people's lives. Then we're left standing in the middle of a desert listening to Debussy or goreki's symphony #3- opus 36. Imagine a helicopter shot, circling a young girl. Her hand extended, a tear falling from her eye.
She holds a key in her left hand and a book in the right. Leave her alone, something tells you. The book has a drawing on it. You are drawn to the book. The book opens to show the subconscious past, a place where all your trauma and fears lie. A place of reminders, a strong powerful place, you've never been able to express.
You want to protect the girl. Take her from this place, hold her tight and tell her not to cry. Feed her soul...but you're afraid. Because she holds the key, the past, your fears. You walk away only to find yourself in the same place you came from, only you're the only one standing in the desert alive. bodies surround you with bleeding hearts. They look familiar to you, people you know, they just lay there. Abandoned, much like yourself. Nobody to heal their bleeding hearts.
Turn. Run as fast as you can. Faster and faster. Until a voice stops you and tells you it will be alright. I've been in your shoes. You sigh. You're not alone. As the years go on you end up standing in front of the child again. Scared, fearful, alone. The child opens her arms to welcome you. You run.
Tuesday, January 10, 2012
Monday, January 9, 2012
Life is changing. Its wonderful.
So i've been looking through one of my writing books. I tend to not finish a book before i start another. So i always have to go back and fill it in again...ahhhh. I came across one piece of writing that I remember writing so well. I dont remember why I wrote it. but it is exactly what i need right now. EXACTLY!
Check it out.
When you've lived with addiction, you learn some skills that set you apart. You learn to cover your ass. You learn to keep drugs close for strengthening purposes. You learn to recognize human behaviour. Never shut things off or shut someone out.
Remember human behaviour and know you can't change what we are. human. Recognize what is ours and only ours, and keep the bad from affecting others. Know you can't bring others into your hate, anger or security blanket. Even if they are willing. Its not fair. Its not fair to keep someone close on your own terms. You're only hurting them and in the end your terms wont be met.
Be honest. Show people who you are and who you could be. Good and bad. The ones with love will take that and work with it beside you to overcome or achieve. The ones with fear will push you away not understanding that being human is what makes you who you are. They will also keep you around maybe for a sense of control, for lack of a better word.
The ones with hate will throw you out. No matter how much you love them or they love you. You're not alive to them. No matter if you're a good person. They aren't human. But we're all human;)
be happy with who you are and what you've got. Even if you dont have anything there is a chance you could lose it.
Weird is a term often used to disregard. Forgetting to understand and educate.
Education is key. Life, books, school, death, drugs, hate, love, fear. Are all ways to learn. Learn what you will tolerate and challenge those limits.
Recognize hate and remove it from your actions.
Sharing is caring. Never hide from what you are, who you are or what you've done. Remember other peoples limits, respect and challenge them.
Dont sit by and let people hurt others. Stand up for the ones who nee help and can't help themselves. Its a sad world where people get cast aside. In this world, "Survival of the fittest." be the fittest and help the unfit.
Make goals. Achieve goals. Break goals. Only to figure out you can make more.
Believe in yourself and others. Trust everyone and no one. Except the people that are closest to you that you want to push away. They deserve your trust because they out of anyone have something you need to believe.
Selfishness is good and bad. Find the good and roll with it.
Everything is a contradiction when you understand. Don't not understand. You always know.
We are people and no one is any less important. Race, sex, sexual orientation, age, choices...are not good reasons to project hate and cause even more fear in the world.
Well there you go. Relevant at any point. especially now.
Thanks for writing this long time ago self.
Check it out.
When you've lived with addiction, you learn some skills that set you apart. You learn to cover your ass. You learn to keep drugs close for strengthening purposes. You learn to recognize human behaviour. Never shut things off or shut someone out.
Remember human behaviour and know you can't change what we are. human. Recognize what is ours and only ours, and keep the bad from affecting others. Know you can't bring others into your hate, anger or security blanket. Even if they are willing. Its not fair. Its not fair to keep someone close on your own terms. You're only hurting them and in the end your terms wont be met.
Be honest. Show people who you are and who you could be. Good and bad. The ones with love will take that and work with it beside you to overcome or achieve. The ones with fear will push you away not understanding that being human is what makes you who you are. They will also keep you around maybe for a sense of control, for lack of a better word.
The ones with hate will throw you out. No matter how much you love them or they love you. You're not alive to them. No matter if you're a good person. They aren't human. But we're all human;)
be happy with who you are and what you've got. Even if you dont have anything there is a chance you could lose it.
Weird is a term often used to disregard. Forgetting to understand and educate.
Education is key. Life, books, school, death, drugs, hate, love, fear. Are all ways to learn. Learn what you will tolerate and challenge those limits.
Recognize hate and remove it from your actions.
Sharing is caring. Never hide from what you are, who you are or what you've done. Remember other peoples limits, respect and challenge them.
Dont sit by and let people hurt others. Stand up for the ones who nee help and can't help themselves. Its a sad world where people get cast aside. In this world, "Survival of the fittest." be the fittest and help the unfit.
Make goals. Achieve goals. Break goals. Only to figure out you can make more.
Believe in yourself and others. Trust everyone and no one. Except the people that are closest to you that you want to push away. They deserve your trust because they out of anyone have something you need to believe.
Selfishness is good and bad. Find the good and roll with it.
Everything is a contradiction when you understand. Don't not understand. You always know.
We are people and no one is any less important. Race, sex, sexual orientation, age, choices...are not good reasons to project hate and cause even more fear in the world.
Well there you go. Relevant at any point. especially now.
Thanks for writing this long time ago self.
Sunday, July 17, 2011
Wowzers
Here we go. The fear in which we're faced with.
So I went to see one of my doctors. I'm pretty sure I want to get off of this horrible 'Lamotragine'. I'm faced with this...If I come off of it...I may become a vegetable. Although I love vegetables, I'm faced with fear. Do I listen to the fear? most people in my family and life think that I should. Although I still haven't seen my neurologist, that wont be till august 8th, I have been faced with BRICK walls of information. Of support from the western medical system. Being told things that go against this gut i've been learning to listen to religiously. I'm being told that i have the best neurologist in vancouver and he's worth listening to. But if you actually met this guy then you'd see or feel that he hardly looked at me. He seem holier than thou and made me feel as if he was the only one that knew the truth and the truth was his 'medical opinion' which i am supposed to live by.
Ok. Honestly. this advice from one of my doctors scared me. I have an ear infection and I'm vulnerable to bipolar feelings as this medication makes its way into my brain and actually stops activity. The bridges where my brain waves used to cross are no longer in use the way they were. So in a sense all of the natural healing and shamanism that i've lived for all my life has had to stop. The use of anything other than the 'systems' medications have come to a full stop. I know i need more opinions once i go for my reassessment. I'm in search of someone who is willing to give up what they 'know' for what they know is possible. I'm in search of a glimmer of hope. Something that i can hold onto and place in my heart of hearts in order to move through all of the salt lying on the table...in order to find my favourite condiment...the pepper. Also. the meds i'm on stop sodium from entering my brain..another interesting fact.
So there we go. I'm scared. Flat out. I know the power of the brain and i'm believing in a future of freedom from these chains of our society. My whole life i've tried to break free, only to be brought back, slingshotted back into a world without real security. One where life as it used to be is to be forgotten, now. We destroyed the natives in this continent because of the same reasons. Power. Control. If we can take our machines into places like the jungle in order to give sight to those who have lost it. We should be able to integrate a kind of spiritual natural healing that doesn't involve a god, or something of that kind. But rather our human capabilities. I believe in the power of love and the power of us. If only we knew that all of these things have been forgotten and they are what we used to be.
Suffice to say. My jedi wizard training has been put on hold. Maybe this is apart of the training. Although in the world i know. Seizures are initiations into the shamanic realm.
So I'm in search of someone in the medical profession that is going to hear my cries for freedom. I need a lwayer of sorts to prove that my brain is innocent until proven guilty. In order to save my life...I must believe.
Thanks for listening.
emotional wreck.
So I went to see one of my doctors. I'm pretty sure I want to get off of this horrible 'Lamotragine'. I'm faced with this...If I come off of it...I may become a vegetable. Although I love vegetables, I'm faced with fear. Do I listen to the fear? most people in my family and life think that I should. Although I still haven't seen my neurologist, that wont be till august 8th, I have been faced with BRICK walls of information. Of support from the western medical system. Being told things that go against this gut i've been learning to listen to religiously. I'm being told that i have the best neurologist in vancouver and he's worth listening to. But if you actually met this guy then you'd see or feel that he hardly looked at me. He seem holier than thou and made me feel as if he was the only one that knew the truth and the truth was his 'medical opinion' which i am supposed to live by.
Ok. Honestly. this advice from one of my doctors scared me. I have an ear infection and I'm vulnerable to bipolar feelings as this medication makes its way into my brain and actually stops activity. The bridges where my brain waves used to cross are no longer in use the way they were. So in a sense all of the natural healing and shamanism that i've lived for all my life has had to stop. The use of anything other than the 'systems' medications have come to a full stop. I know i need more opinions once i go for my reassessment. I'm in search of someone who is willing to give up what they 'know' for what they know is possible. I'm in search of a glimmer of hope. Something that i can hold onto and place in my heart of hearts in order to move through all of the salt lying on the table...in order to find my favourite condiment...the pepper. Also. the meds i'm on stop sodium from entering my brain..another interesting fact.
So there we go. I'm scared. Flat out. I know the power of the brain and i'm believing in a future of freedom from these chains of our society. My whole life i've tried to break free, only to be brought back, slingshotted back into a world without real security. One where life as it used to be is to be forgotten, now. We destroyed the natives in this continent because of the same reasons. Power. Control. If we can take our machines into places like the jungle in order to give sight to those who have lost it. We should be able to integrate a kind of spiritual natural healing that doesn't involve a god, or something of that kind. But rather our human capabilities. I believe in the power of love and the power of us. If only we knew that all of these things have been forgotten and they are what we used to be.
Suffice to say. My jedi wizard training has been put on hold. Maybe this is apart of the training. Although in the world i know. Seizures are initiations into the shamanic realm.
So I'm in search of someone in the medical profession that is going to hear my cries for freedom. I need a lwayer of sorts to prove that my brain is innocent until proven guilty. In order to save my life...I must believe.
Thanks for listening.
emotional wreck.
Monday, July 11, 2011
Ah HAH...the examinations we face
Hello lovelies.
I am here to talk. But we know that.
So if you've been along for the ride you'd know that i had some seizures. been on medication. Felt blocked, fell in love...living in cold and wet.
Now its warming up...still in full pj's though.
I'm faced with this conundrum. I'm in western society. (disclaimer for all those people who urge me to think about it and be careful. way ahead of you) I love what western medicine has to offer. I LOVE IT! I also dont love it. Like how someone could love nighttime but dislike the scary things that can come from it.
The medication I am on is also used for bipolar disorder. I dont know if anyone has ever been on an antidepressant before? they suck. They make me feel angry, irritable, The activity that helps my flag fly high is stifled by this thing hanging over me. Slowing me down. This medication stops the extreme ups and downs from happening in my brain. If you look into epilepsy in all forms, you'd see that there are a list of somewhat known causes. Read through them and tell me if you have any of these? because when i had the seizures I could have checked off every possible cause on the list.
Then i learn more about misdiagnosis with epilepsy and find out how much they actually know about seizures, its not much. Yes a lot. but Not as much as one like me would hope.
This all makes me think of my life, the thing i've been searching for the entire time. BALANCE. the libra in me is tipping the scale. The balance is now very much imbalanced. One sided. One dimensional.
so! what do i do about it now?
I'm getting the heck off of these meds. This life i'm in, this world is too important to me to have to take an anticonvulsant when my love and passion comes from this brain. I understand the consequences if there are any...but they'll all be great. Because its life, we manage it, we have ups and downs. We all get seizures (look into it, we do). This western medicine will help me with my health when needed. I honestly dont think i need their help with droning out the passion. Being a writer does that enough,) ha
so. august is the month. 6 months. I can in theory drive again. But i'm going to come off my meds. so probably not for a lot longer. But i dont care. I'll do it. life is for living. I'm cool, calm, collected. and would really love to get on with my life.
I haven't discussed it yet with the neuro docs...We can discuss it. I understand. But dont let them put the fear in you. We're human.
dear crazy
I am here to talk. But we know that.
So if you've been along for the ride you'd know that i had some seizures. been on medication. Felt blocked, fell in love...living in cold and wet.
Now its warming up...still in full pj's though.
I'm faced with this conundrum. I'm in western society. (disclaimer for all those people who urge me to think about it and be careful. way ahead of you) I love what western medicine has to offer. I LOVE IT! I also dont love it. Like how someone could love nighttime but dislike the scary things that can come from it.
The medication I am on is also used for bipolar disorder. I dont know if anyone has ever been on an antidepressant before? they suck. They make me feel angry, irritable, The activity that helps my flag fly high is stifled by this thing hanging over me. Slowing me down. This medication stops the extreme ups and downs from happening in my brain. If you look into epilepsy in all forms, you'd see that there are a list of somewhat known causes. Read through them and tell me if you have any of these? because when i had the seizures I could have checked off every possible cause on the list.
Then i learn more about misdiagnosis with epilepsy and find out how much they actually know about seizures, its not much. Yes a lot. but Not as much as one like me would hope.
This all makes me think of my life, the thing i've been searching for the entire time. BALANCE. the libra in me is tipping the scale. The balance is now very much imbalanced. One sided. One dimensional.
so! what do i do about it now?
I'm getting the heck off of these meds. This life i'm in, this world is too important to me to have to take an anticonvulsant when my love and passion comes from this brain. I understand the consequences if there are any...but they'll all be great. Because its life, we manage it, we have ups and downs. We all get seizures (look into it, we do). This western medicine will help me with my health when needed. I honestly dont think i need their help with droning out the passion. Being a writer does that enough,) ha
so. august is the month. 6 months. I can in theory drive again. But i'm going to come off my meds. so probably not for a lot longer. But i dont care. I'll do it. life is for living. I'm cool, calm, collected. and would really love to get on with my life.
I haven't discussed it yet with the neuro docs...We can discuss it. I understand. But dont let them put the fear in you. We're human.
dear crazy
Monday, April 4, 2011
Saying goodbye
Marijuana has been my best friend since I was 14... All other friends were there, but this one was the one that saved my life.
I had seizures as I think I mentioned. A few months prior I quit smoking. Something I did once before, but I had no responsibilities. I lived a simple life. Now. With so many choices, so many things going on, a new love, a new life, an old life a past that needs to no longer be mourned and a future to be taken on...did I mention I'm in my Saturn return?
So I had these seizures..what a trip...memory loss, pain. Lots of it. Love...wow most amazing person I know with the kindest heart that I fell in love with so safely and easily. But a little rough around the edges...but didn't I always say French canadians were rough around the edges! Whistler people would know what I'm talking about.
My life had never been so stressful. I've been stressed! But I've been stoned and no responsibilities. I was young. Now I'm 27..time to see what no longer serves me. This is what Saturn is telling all of us.
The meds they put me on made me dull, lost, mindless, emotionless to an extent...now I'm coming down off one...mynlife has seriously changed...dude,) now all of a sudden I have my emotions, my crazy has returned. I don't know what to do with it. I have someone else to think about, you hear that all the time when people have babies. But you don't hear about it when talking about love! Because I think about them everyday! A different kind I guess. Now I have to find a. Job. One which is not my old ones. Hmmm how fucking hard is this. I say I could do anything...but I feel stuck...I can't. Live somewhere I thought I was running away from. Now I'm forced to face my past...and my future all at once! Is it because I'm 27 that this is happening? Is that you Saturn? Omg.
Wait...why did I seizure? Stress! Breathe. Remember you don't want to take another medley of pharms...so.
I smoked a joint today. Ease. Relax..pain gone. Emotions calmed...
Of course then comes the clenching and such that I hated before. Of course.
Coffee and weed. My best friends...I can't call you that anymore. I need to face the insanity. I have to be human again.
Sigh...
Where is my inhaler?
.)
I had seizures as I think I mentioned. A few months prior I quit smoking. Something I did once before, but I had no responsibilities. I lived a simple life. Now. With so many choices, so many things going on, a new love, a new life, an old life a past that needs to no longer be mourned and a future to be taken on...did I mention I'm in my Saturn return?
So I had these seizures..what a trip...memory loss, pain. Lots of it. Love...wow most amazing person I know with the kindest heart that I fell in love with so safely and easily. But a little rough around the edges...but didn't I always say French canadians were rough around the edges! Whistler people would know what I'm talking about.
My life had never been so stressful. I've been stressed! But I've been stoned and no responsibilities. I was young. Now I'm 27..time to see what no longer serves me. This is what Saturn is telling all of us.
The meds they put me on made me dull, lost, mindless, emotionless to an extent...now I'm coming down off one...mynlife has seriously changed...dude,) now all of a sudden I have my emotions, my crazy has returned. I don't know what to do with it. I have someone else to think about, you hear that all the time when people have babies. But you don't hear about it when talking about love! Because I think about them everyday! A different kind I guess. Now I have to find a. Job. One which is not my old ones. Hmmm how fucking hard is this. I say I could do anything...but I feel stuck...I can't. Live somewhere I thought I was running away from. Now I'm forced to face my past...and my future all at once! Is it because I'm 27 that this is happening? Is that you Saturn? Omg.
Wait...why did I seizure? Stress! Breathe. Remember you don't want to take another medley of pharms...so.
I smoked a joint today. Ease. Relax..pain gone. Emotions calmed...
Of course then comes the clenching and such that I hated before. Of course.
Coffee and weed. My best friends...I can't call you that anymore. I need to face the insanity. I have to be human again.
Sigh...
Where is my inhaler?
.)
Friday, April 1, 2011
Read if you want it has an I love about you at the end
I've been dizzy all day. Even as I sit I feel like the ground might flip to the ceiling. Leaving me half way between falling and fallen. The waves are hitting the shore. There is a flower outside that smells like you. I knew this would be hard. I'm sleeping in a bed that would fit the two of us perfectly, the way you'd make all beds if you had your way. Just right. Like the three bears. Although no bears just bear hugs and things just right. There is a pillow beside me that feels like it's meant for a pregnant woman. Reminds me of that jennifer Lopez movie you bought. I smile.
Oh how life brings us these things.
I didn't want to watch the sunset because my eyes are full of tears in protest of your absence...or mine...I think it may be both.
I thought about how one leaves their past behind? Do we ever really..I know we can and will learn from it but can it be left at the side of the road like a piece of Kleenex that falls out of the car when you step out. Never seen again? Maybe you see other pieces everywhere you go. But will you ever see that one again...i know it's impossible to leave it like that. I've never been one to abandon anything in my past. It makes it harder to live if I just leave it somewhere.
I thought about how to live in the now and create a future. First I asked what is future? Who, where, when, why, how, what...everything. When I managed to create the list in my head I knew what I had to do. In order to do this this and this with that and mostly YOU. I'm going to have to do this this and this with mostly that and no YOU...I cried tears.
No you?!
Who are you?
Good question. You're the sun in my sky, the light in my eyes, the fresh air in my nostrils, the warm liquid in my belly...the love in my heart...all the little things of 'awesome' you could ever imagine. That who YOU is.
You has to be in my everything. You is my everything. I want you in my life so badly I need you. It's not the idea of you that gets me excited to breathe the air it's knowing you, being with you, seeing you, loving you, truly loving you. The idea is a great idea, but i'm not just looking for a great idea. I have many of those. I'm looking for a reality. In order to have a reality I have to face a reality.
Well what is this reality?
Take what you have learned from the past and relearn it over and over again.
The things that follow you from behind won't go away until you confront them. That means you may have to feel the pain of losing something or someone, or everything.
Who you think you are isn't always what you should be thinking, it's what you feel.
Love who you love, although not all loves are the truest of loves they're still real...and you'll know when the true ones come along. It's hard to miss.
Well now that I'm facing the things behind me I feel a distance growing between the true love that I have found. In order to make YOU the reality I am looking for I must face the things I'm facing today. I may face them by losing you. But I'm not a quitter when it comes to true YOU. I'm not going to stop loving you.
As silly song comes to my head.. Everything I do, I do it for you!
Good ol'brian Adams.
Anyhow. My thoughts before I sleep. I need to get some. Dr's orders,)
I LOVE THAT YOU BRING SONGS TO MY HEAD
Oh how life brings us these things.
I didn't want to watch the sunset because my eyes are full of tears in protest of your absence...or mine...I think it may be both.
I thought about how one leaves their past behind? Do we ever really..I know we can and will learn from it but can it be left at the side of the road like a piece of Kleenex that falls out of the car when you step out. Never seen again? Maybe you see other pieces everywhere you go. But will you ever see that one again...i know it's impossible to leave it like that. I've never been one to abandon anything in my past. It makes it harder to live if I just leave it somewhere.
I thought about how to live in the now and create a future. First I asked what is future? Who, where, when, why, how, what...everything. When I managed to create the list in my head I knew what I had to do. In order to do this this and this with that and mostly YOU. I'm going to have to do this this and this with mostly that and no YOU...I cried tears.
No you?!
Who are you?
Good question. You're the sun in my sky, the light in my eyes, the fresh air in my nostrils, the warm liquid in my belly...the love in my heart...all the little things of 'awesome' you could ever imagine. That who YOU is.
You has to be in my everything. You is my everything. I want you in my life so badly I need you. It's not the idea of you that gets me excited to breathe the air it's knowing you, being with you, seeing you, loving you, truly loving you. The idea is a great idea, but i'm not just looking for a great idea. I have many of those. I'm looking for a reality. In order to have a reality I have to face a reality.
Well what is this reality?
Take what you have learned from the past and relearn it over and over again.
The things that follow you from behind won't go away until you confront them. That means you may have to feel the pain of losing something or someone, or everything.
Who you think you are isn't always what you should be thinking, it's what you feel.
Love who you love, although not all loves are the truest of loves they're still real...and you'll know when the true ones come along. It's hard to miss.
Well now that I'm facing the things behind me I feel a distance growing between the true love that I have found. In order to make YOU the reality I am looking for I must face the things I'm facing today. I may face them by losing you. But I'm not a quitter when it comes to true YOU. I'm not going to stop loving you.
As silly song comes to my head.. Everything I do, I do it for you!
Good ol'brian Adams.
Anyhow. My thoughts before I sleep. I need to get some. Dr's orders,)
I LOVE THAT YOU BRING SONGS TO MY HEAD
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
New life
Today is a day. One that although i'm pretty happy I seem to want to get away. I am not really all that great with this northern weather. Since i've been living in southern california i've come to realize that WARM is better...Yes vancouver has wonderful trees and great colours and beautiful scenery. And if I was still high on mushrooms or weed I may actually enjoy it.
I've recently had something physical happen to me. Something that landed me in the hospital in the neurological intensive care unit. Although scary and not a good thing in some ways...something perfect in another. The fact that i got to find out if there was anything wrong with my brain or not...which there isn't. And the fact that maybe i'm getting my upgrades like I wanted.
In the world we live in there are different types of people. We all live on different dimensional playing fields. Some like monks have had the upgrade to be able to not eat as much as the rest of the world. Taking nutrients from all sorts of things, like air, water, sun light. Yogis have had upgrades. Shaman. and so on. Of course there are all different forms of upgrades. An ability to reach into other minds. The ability to feed off sunlight, communicate with nature, walk with great peace, even move things with our minds.
A long time ago when I was working at a festival in the kootneys I said to the crew...after a big lunch and long rest...'Maybe if we loved each other enough we could move things with our minds..' This was of course to avoid having to get up and get to work. Little did i know I would spend a big part of my life actually believing that this was true. I do. I believe it is entirely possible to move things with our minds. Although I am not able to at the moment i feel that maybe this upgrade is possible in this lifetime. Seeing as though in some cultures shaman are found through great madness and seizures. Hmmmm. madness and seizures eh.
Not to say that I am a shaman. Far from it. Although my Vote Love For Hate is a step in the right direction. Redefining many aspects of our lives and allowing us to reinvent our linear ways of thinking.
Flat land exists on this planet. Most people live in it. When you disregard a way of thinking because of a belief system you were raised in...whether it be western culture, religion, or anti religion...you are limited to a simple playing field.
The seizures that I had were a blessing in disguise. I can't legally drive for six months and I have a clarity that I do not understand nor have I been able to grasp it fully yet. But at some point maybe i'll recognize what it is i've been given.
Thanks Life for giving me something new.
VLFH
I've recently had something physical happen to me. Something that landed me in the hospital in the neurological intensive care unit. Although scary and not a good thing in some ways...something perfect in another. The fact that i got to find out if there was anything wrong with my brain or not...which there isn't. And the fact that maybe i'm getting my upgrades like I wanted.
In the world we live in there are different types of people. We all live on different dimensional playing fields. Some like monks have had the upgrade to be able to not eat as much as the rest of the world. Taking nutrients from all sorts of things, like air, water, sun light. Yogis have had upgrades. Shaman. and so on. Of course there are all different forms of upgrades. An ability to reach into other minds. The ability to feed off sunlight, communicate with nature, walk with great peace, even move things with our minds.
A long time ago when I was working at a festival in the kootneys I said to the crew...after a big lunch and long rest...'Maybe if we loved each other enough we could move things with our minds..' This was of course to avoid having to get up and get to work. Little did i know I would spend a big part of my life actually believing that this was true. I do. I believe it is entirely possible to move things with our minds. Although I am not able to at the moment i feel that maybe this upgrade is possible in this lifetime. Seeing as though in some cultures shaman are found through great madness and seizures. Hmmmm. madness and seizures eh.
Not to say that I am a shaman. Far from it. Although my Vote Love For Hate is a step in the right direction. Redefining many aspects of our lives and allowing us to reinvent our linear ways of thinking.
Flat land exists on this planet. Most people live in it. When you disregard a way of thinking because of a belief system you were raised in...whether it be western culture, religion, or anti religion...you are limited to a simple playing field.
The seizures that I had were a blessing in disguise. I can't legally drive for six months and I have a clarity that I do not understand nor have I been able to grasp it fully yet. But at some point maybe i'll recognize what it is i've been given.
Thanks Life for giving me something new.
VLFH
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